Tom Hanks' rapping son Chet Haze drops first video for 'Hollywood': Watch it here

As an actor, Tom Hanks has given the world unforgettable performances in such modern classics as Forrest Gump, Philadelphia, Cast Away, and Saving Private Ryan.

As a producer of other human beings, he has given us both Colin Hanks (currently playing a creepy killer on the new season of Dexter) and Chester Hanks, a Northwestern student who moonlights as a rapper/crooner known as Chet Haze, and who just released his first official music video.

On “Hollywood,” Haze croon-raps his offer to be both a woman’s manager and director in a private film that involves “no extras,” which probably means it’s a tribute to My Dinner With Andre or something minimalist like that. Right?

As for the song itself, Haze’s vocals seem to be distorted and slowed down to extra-syrupy levels, as though the mixing board was having transmission problems.

Check out Haze’s “Hollywood” debut below.

On the Hanks Scale, “Hollywood” probably falls somewhere in between Turner & Hooch and The Ladykillers. On the Chet Scale (which measures the strengths of dudes named Chet), Haze sits well below country guitarist Chet Atkins, jazz trumpet legend Chet Baker, and former Philadelphia 76ers and Chicago Bulls forward Chet “The Jet” Walker, but above Top Ten Forgettable President Chester Arthur and this guy.

Where do you stand on Chet Haze’s “Hollywood,” both as a song and a video? Want to hear more, or would you rather spend time watching Orange County? Let us know in the comments.

Read more on EW.com:
Tom Hanks’ son ‘Chet Haze’ debuts ‘White and Purple’ rap song: is he any good?
‘Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close’ trailer: Tom Hanks will send you on a journey… and make you cry
Colin Hanks goes dark in killer ‘Lucky’ trailer


Comments (37 total) Add your comment
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  • Jenn

    How embarrassing.

  • anne

    Just proves that is often WHO YOU KNOW and not actually talent that gets you opportunities.

  • chuckles

    wow if you have $$ and your Dad is famous you too can make a crappy song and video

  • Catlin

    What the…

  • ®ustymustdie

    He hits all the points with the little girls…fashion, fame, ballad like hook. Total drivel but will probably translate into a hit. makes a person see just how doomed we are as a materialistic waste of a society.

    • gato

      Cheer up!!

  • Kimberly

    Repetitive, trite and boring, but otherwise great.

    • Vinay

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  • JD in WV

    I actually liked it. It’s catchy, he’s got a decent voice and he’s cute as can be.

  • Big Walt

    “I ain’t never seen a swagger like your’s. You’re rocking items most chicks can’t afford.” The kid is a poet!

  • Natalie

    Um, that is really weird. It’s wayyyy slowed down, his lip syncing is way off and the song is pretty tedious. Why don’t you try to get a real job, kid, rather than trying to cash in on daddy’s fame?

  • Craploa

    If your parents are famous you can be a “celebritaaay”, too. Ugh. This is a mess.

  • Stephen

    Poor Tom Hanks, I guess his debt for “Joe Versus the Volcano” is greater than any of us imagined.

    Dear God,
    If there was ever a case for abortion it is Chet Haze.

  • Rob

    I never heard of Chet until Howard Stern played clips of him ‘rapping’ and his normal way of talking. It was the funniest and saddest thing I had heard. Can’t wait to hear what Howard has to say about this!

    • Sedat

      I didn’t even know there was a Colin Hanks in the family. First Reggie, and now Colin?a0 Those two shulod just hook-up and start their own family .BOOM!

  • Almar

    What In God’s Name Is This? This Dude is a joke.

  • Blarls Smarkley

    I’m so sick of the term “swag”. The song sucks and the video is terrible.

    • Dionata

      you’re gonna kill Tom because of the money pit?? The man made Joe vs The Volcano where he actlauly fell into a volcano and survied he also had AIDS and lived great genes

  • NonEntity

    Well, if the song truly sucks, I’m sure it will definitely hit it big in America, home of the YouTube sensation worshipping, corn syrup guzzling, makeup swallowing, intellectually lazy and indifferent wage slave class.

    • YourMom

      Jealousy is an ugly color.

      • she

        true that their all just mad

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