Wu Tang's 'secret' album has a new featured guest: Cher

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Image Credit: Jo Hale/Getty Images; Alexx Henry

Cher will appear on two tracks off of Wu-Tang’s upcoming “secret album” The Wu – Once Upon a Time in Shaolin. (Hear a snippet here).

I imagine the conversation that led to this decision went something like this:

Wu-Tang publicist: You want people to bid on this, we gotta sell what’s hot right now. Like fairytale shows, ‘secret albums,’ Lady Gaga…

RZA: No. Not Gaga. This album is too special to jeopardize with her shenanigans.

Ghostface: Sick. She’s the one with the meat dress and the vomiting? Pass.

Wu-Tang publicist: But people love her! Fine. Well, what about Cher?

Method Man: Sure. [Shrugs, but secretly jumping for joy inside. Yes! Cher! Finally we will meet!]

To be fair, Cher’s got a killer voice and some serious flavor and Wu-Tang brings it hard, so who knows, this could be the best thing ever. I sincerely hope we get a promotional mash-up of “Strong Enough” and “Wu-Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthing Ta F–k Wit.”

Unfortunately, the Wu is only pressing one copy of this record, which will be sold to the highest bidder as a collector’s album in a gold case.  The always-understated RZA explains their motivation for the album: “We’re about to put out a piece of art like nobody else has done in the history of [modern] music. We’re making a single-sale collector’s item. This is like somebody having the scepter of an Egyptian king.”

Before it’s sold though, mere civilians will be able to listen to it (using headphones to prevent piracy) as it goes on a world tour of festivals and museums. Rolling Stone has details of how this crazy collaboration came to be.

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