Kim Kardashian's new music video for 'Jam (Turn It Up)' prominently features Kim's Kardashian

Kim Kardashian is a brilliant entrepreneur. Anyone who can reportedly make almost $18 million off their own wedding is clearly doing something right.

But don’t let the fact that she’s a newly-married millionairess confuse you: As the preview for her new music video proves, Kim Kardashian is still extremely capable of writhing around a humid air vent while wearing clothes so revealing that actual nudity would be tame by comparison.

The song is called “Jam (Turn It Up)” and as near as I can figure, all of the lyrics are “Turn me up, turn me up. Turn me, turn me, turn me up” (think Ke$ha, without all the socially-conscious undertones). I’m hoping that, in the actual video, Kim actually lets her butt sing, Ace Ventura-style. Watch a preview here:

Music Mixers, what do you think of the video? Are you concerned that Ms. K is sweating so much when there’s a fan pumping right in front of her?

Listen, we can all agree that this video serves as a great stealth audition for a Die Hard reboot, where John McClane becomes “Kandy McKlure,” and the entire second act of the film is just air vents, air vents, air vents!

Follow Darren on Twitter: @EWDarrenFranich

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Nicki Minaj and Rihanna are the last queens standing in ‘Fly’ video: Watch it here


Comments (86 total) Add your comment
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  • AWFUL

    Please revive the space shuttle program and send this vile piece of garbage on a one-way ticket to the moon,

    • UGH

      The Moon is still too close.

      • KC

        The moon wouldn’t fit her @$$.

      • rover

        her butt crack would swallow the moon

      • gary

        The computer doing the singing for her has great tone!

    • PeterBilt

      LOL!!

      • GeGe

        Oh such funny comments…maybe Branson would fly her one way to the moon

  • Allegra Watts

    Kim Kardashian has an amazing figure. I just love her curves. She’s so shapely. She’s a great example to women around the country. She proves that curves really are sexy! I’m not skinny, I’m curvy, but I think that’s the best way to be. Womanly. It’s sexy!

    • Coop

      The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin’.
      Right or wrong?

      • Veritas

        the looser the waistband
        the deeper the quicksand
        or so I have read

      • rover

        now you know why Armenians stock pile toilet paper in their guest bedrooms

    • maggie25

      This is something that really bothers me. Yes, being curvy can be sexy and great, but that doesn’t mean being skinny can’t be good too. There are a lot of different body types. Saying being curvy is better than being skinny is just another way of directing negativity towards a certain body type. Accept them all.

    • *ster

      Having an athletic body type is better than being skinny or curvy. That applies for both sexes. With enough physical effort and proper diet, it’s within everybody’s reach.

    • J

      One person makes a comment about her weight and you all go crazy that she is so beautiful curvy??? What message to you think she is sending??? Get a clue you fat people!

    • Katie

      She’s a slut not a role model

      • rover

        bubble gum butt role model

      • GeGe

        Ah……..WELL SAID…in laws must be sooo proud!!!

    • gary

      You’re an idiot. You said the same exact thing, word-for-word, a week or two ago. Anyways, anyone who thinks she’s any kind of a role model is a sad, pathetic human being.

  • UGH

    What? She’s a cow!

    • DOUCHE

      As much as I dislike her, and the fact that the media obsesses over her, there is no reason to call her a cow.

      • UGH

        Okay. A whale then.

      • gary

        What about “STD-infested slut?”

  • ERNIE

    It’s sad this piece of garbage made it big from making a homemade porn video.

    • ERNIE

      It’s even sadder that EW continues to give her publicity.

    • ST

      How is this any different from her “video”?

      • ERNIE

        This one has a soundtrack.

    • J

      Don’t you find it funny that she acts so appauld on tv when she gets bad publicity – yet she puts herself right out there for the world to see!

    • GeGe

      how true

  • Matt Johnson

    This is some sick demented joke. It has to be.

  • Danny McGavin

    Kim is voluptuous, gorgeous, sexy and beautiful. She’s amazing. That woman is incredible. Armenian perfection doesn’t get much purer than her. There’s a lovely gentleness and sweetness to her.

    • ^

      See? That’s how you troll! You take the most negative “celebrity” there is and you glorify them just to raise people’s blood pressure. There’s nobody in their right mind who actually idolize idiots like the Kardashians.
      I applaud you.

    • J

      I think I am going to throw up!

    • GeGe

      Danny you must be ne desperate guy who just dreams of skanky women…sorry….

  • Kim Kardashian’s Butt Floss

    Turn me up, turn me up. Turn me, turn me, turn me up

    • Kim Kardashian’s Tongue

      Ye-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ah

  • Coop

    That actually makes me yearn for Paris Hilton’s flop of a single….

    • Jenny on the block

      Yes give me Paris Hiltons music over this mess

  • HaHa

    She looks like JLo dipped in oil.

  • Sir Mix-A-Lot

    Gimme a sista can’t resist her,
    red beans and rice didn’t miss her.

  • Audrina Beck

    Kim Kardashian is a very talented entrepreneur, television personality, model and actress. Good for her to film such a high profile music video. She deserves it.

    • lol

      lol

    • D

      Entrepreneur? Yes. Talented? No. The only thing she’s talented in is getting money any way she can.

      She rose to fame thanks to her sex tape. She became famous thanks to her reality show. Everything else has come from that. NO TALENT.

      • Little comment

        Just because your sex tapes aren’t popular doesn’t mean you need to be jealous of someone else’s.

  • Dave

    Paris Hilton’s music was about a million times better than this.

    • Drew

      Seriously. At least paris managed to sound sort of invested in it. Kim sounds monotone throughout the whole thing. like she’s singing every word on one note.

  • Lorraine Holden

    I hope she will play an action heroine one day or at least have one little fight in a movie. Just let her kick a guy in the groin or something.

    • ERNIE

      The closest she will come to that will be that she will be on heroin once her “career” dries up.

  • Youa

    I love that she’s tried so hard to remove her sex tape from the market, and get everyone to forget it ever happened, yet she poses for Playboy and films music videos like this.

    Yeah, she sure does regret that sex tape, huh?

    • UGH

      I doubt it. She signed a deal where she still profits from the tape. There was an article around the time of her wedding about how she stood to make even more money off of it for idiots buying it in anticipation of the wedding.

  • Just Sayin’

    One word: awful.

    First of all, she can’t sing; she’s just talking. And she talks monotone with no emotion in her voice. Her face never shows any emotion either so she looks like a blowup doll with a robot voice.

    Secondly, the music video looks like a bad 80’s workout tape with some outtakes from her sex tape thrown in. Seriously, I thought she was trying to improve her image? I guess she knows sex sells, and can’t help her desire to get as much money as possible.

    I bet her mom was on the sidelines cheering her on…
    “That’s right honey! Lick those lips! Stick out that ass! I’m so proud!”

    • Jenny on the block

      Her face shows no expression or the same expression because of Botox and fillers…notice there are no normal lines in the womans face for her age,,,,,,,,,not normal…this video is on the sociopathic side of ego trip

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