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I got married back in July, and though I had always sort of dreaded planning a wedding (mostly because my mind had been poisoned by celebrity affairs and awful pop culture clichés), the whole experience was incredible.
My wife and I carefully curated every aspect, from the venue (we staged everything in a bookstore run by an AIDS charity) to our clothes (I wore these shoes). It turned out to be the most fun night of my life.
When it came to music, we skipped the idea of having a band or a DJ and went with modern technology (which involved me plugging my iTunes into the store’s sound system). We spent many hours carefully curating the playlist, balancing the fast songs with the slow songs and slipping in a healthy combination of stuff people wanted to hear with songs that were particularly meaningful to us—categories that often met in the middle, especially in the case of Ginuwine’s “Pony”.
There was one song that got more discussion than any other one, and that was the tune that would score our first dance. As dyed-in-the-wool music geeks, we ran through a number of different ideas, trying to find something that would not only have the appropriate lyrical content but also would sound cool and be danceable.
We also didn’t want to have something typical that gets played at every wedding. “At Last” is pretty song, but it’s been used so many times that it couldn’t possibly feel like our own. As for the rest of this list of popular first dance songs, they’re all either schlocky (anything by Shania Twain), confusing (we can’t think of anything but animated lion cubs snuggling when we hear Elton John’s “Can You Feel the Love Tonight?”), or just plain wrong (“If I Loved You,” from Carousel, is a fantasy about how the character isn’t in love; later in that play, he smacks around his wife and she’s sort of OK with it).
Luckily, we each have large record collections, and had a good time weighing ideas. We very nearly went with “This Is the Day” by The The (both because it’s an awesomely ’80s faux-goth synth tune and because it plays over the final scene of Empire Records), but ultimately, we went with Matthew Sweet’s “We’re the Same” (because it’s a pretty song we both love and because we both cited Sweet as a favorite artist on our online dating profiles, which brought us together for the first time five years ago).
This discussion got a lot of people around the EW office thinking about their own first dance songs (or what theirs might be), so we decided to toss it to you. If you are married, what song did you end up using? And if you’re not, what do you plan on scoring that important moment? Let the ceremony begin in the comments below.
Read more at EW.com:
What’s your song of summer 2011? Tell us here
Review: Matthew Sweet, 100% Fun
Sofia Coppola marries longtime boyfriend Thomas Mars in Italy
We used a song by Staind- Tangled Up in You.
We used “When You Say Nothing At All” by Ronan Keating from the Notting Hill soundtrack. The marriage didn’t last but I still love that song!!!
Baby Got Back
“I Used To Love Her” by Guns-n-Roses
I love that song. We were planning on that till I discovered chester see and we used his song “From LA to Rome” best decision we made.
That’s my favorite song but not Keating. Have you ever heard of Keith Whitley’s version? If you haven’t, please do!
“Shelter” by Ray LaMontagne
We used the Keating version too. Looking back I wish we wouldn’t have done a song at all. It was boring and long for guests to watch. It would have been more fun to start the party immediately with everyone.
Don’t get married. How about that?
A Moment Like This by Kelly Clarkson
“Baby got back” ? Is that you, Chris Colfer ?
Chuck Taylors, oh how original. *rolling eyes*
BFD.
I agree I was hoping the shoes would be something cool, green chucks. *yawn*
I think it’s cute. In my dream wedding I want the whole wedding party to wear red chucks.
I wore Chucks at my wedding, as did all my groomsmen. To some of us, it is a BFD.
no, you just think you are BFD.. more like soiled BVDs
And your problem is, blurb?
Nick, is your real name Drew?
Really! Wow, Kyle, you’re so unconventionally wacky!
Nick2, nope, it’s my real name.
Rachmaninoff’s Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini.
Debussy’s Clair de Lune
Peter Gabriel’s Book of Love
Peter Gabriel’s Book of Love was ours too…saw it on Scrubs and loved it ever since.
I saw it on Scrubs too, and absolutely love it! I would also go with Kenny Chesney’s Me and You
“Ring Ding Dong” by Ice Cube & Dr. Dre
Awesome! Cygnus, they are great pieces.
Book of Love is an excellent song, but my husband and I used “Come Rain or Come Shine” by Ray Charles when we married 20 years ago. The lyrics were perfect and Brother Ray is my husband’s favorite artist. If marrying today, I’d also consider ‘Today’ by Joshua Radin or ‘Marry You’ by Bruno Mars. Former because it is beautiful, latter because it is just a fun song. But honestly, hard to beat the original.
Fly Me to The Moon – By Ol’ Blue Eyes himself. Best first dance song possible. Its timeless classy and all about love.
That was mine too! For the reasons you gave, and also because it is relatively easy to dance to and is a good length. That’s what she said.
We went with Frankie, too, but the old standard “Our Love is Here to Stay.” There’s a reason he (and the song) are classics…and we wanted something timeless. 12 years of marriage later, and that’s still our song.
“Frankie”–yuck. Why in the world would you want to commemorate your marriage with a song by an ugly, ruthless thug?
Another Sinatra fan here – first dance was to “It Had To Be You”.
OMG, that is a fantastic choice. Staind’s ballads are so underrated. They’re really moving and heartfelt and this song in particular is great example!
“No siento penas” by Juanes, yes it’s in spanish, but the lyrics are beautiful
My husband and I got married in 2007 and we used “Knocks Me Off My Feet” by Stevie Wonder. We didn’t really have a song and my favorite artist of all time is Stevie Wonder, so my husband obliged. I also didn’t want a well-known Stevie Wonder song, so we picked “Knocks Me Off My Feet” because it is lesser known. Our wedding was also one of the most fun nights of our lives. Glad you had a great time at yours!
Hard to go wrong with Stevie Wonder. We went with “You Are the Sunshine of My Life.” To this day it remains our song. Whenever I hear it I think of our awesome wedding and how much I love my wonderful wife.
I just got married this last Saturday and we used “All I do” by Stevie Wonder. It was “our song” and we went back and forth about using it cause it’s more of a fast song. We went with it and it was wonderful.
You can add me to the Stevie Wonder club, too. We used For Once In My Life. We took a few lessons and it went over great.
All I ever do is you by Stevie Wonder
Ours was “I Just Called to Say I Love You”. I didn’t put a lot of thought into what would be our first dance, though. I’d loaded the iPod with Stevie, Sinatra, Etta, Roy Orbison (for my mom), and a few other standards. (Don’t judge.)
“I Just Called” was my favourite song when I was little, and when it came on the playlist, my mom started pointing at me gleefully and I figured she wanted us to dance, so we did. Turns out she was just pointing at me because it was “my song”.
“lucky” by jason mraz and colbie caillat.
That was our wedding song too, loved it!!
Great pick.
We want to use “I’m Yours”
It’s our song, and tons of people probably use it nowadays, but it’s been our song since we started dating. We were recently at a wedding where the bride and groom danced to Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” and while it was very them, the tone it set was kind of odd.
I’m also walking down the aisle to the beginning of “The Final Countdown” which I think is tacky and hysterical at the same time.
“Ever Fallen In Love With Someone (You Shouldn’t've Fallen In Love With)?” by The Buzzc*cks.
Brian
A few of my favorite love songs:
Share My Life by KEM
I Can’t Tell You Why by the Eagles (my favorite)
Unchained Melody by Righteous Brothers
Guitars of the Heart (Happy) by Syleena Johnson
You Send Me by Sam Cooke
I’ll Write A Song by Earth Wind & Fire
Let’s Fall In Love by Isley Brothers
Woman by John Lennon
Spoiled by Joss Stone
Oh please NOT Unchained Melody. I would be puking. So overdone.
Furthermore, not exactly a happy song.
wow @LadyJNewYork can you make me a CD. lol
Not to date myself but “Always” by Atlantic Starr is my wedding song. I also always loved Luther Vandross’ “You and I” which is still wildly popular.
I was embarrassed to admit to “Always”! The last dance before we left was to “Lady in Red”. My daughter swears her first dance will be “Marry me” by Train.
She will change her mind 1000 times so don’t worry! : )
“Sweethearts Together” Rolling Stones or
“No Greater Love” Amy Winehouse
I danced to Brown Eyes by Lady Gaga and then we danced to U Smile by Bieber! Such an AMAZING day.
At the last minute we picked Every Morning by Keb’ Mo’, because we both loved the song and it’s nice and short. Our second choice was Swept Away (the sentimental version) by the Avett Brothers.
My wife and I danced to “Thank You” by Led Zepellin. It was sweet and honest, but also let our friends know we’re bad asses.
My husband and I danced to “Thank You” as well!
That was mine and My husband’s song also- just great lyrics!
That was my prom theme. We were a whole class of bad asses.
I always thought it should be Black Dog by Zepellin.
Great choice, Nate.
That would be a hard song to dance to! I love it, but with the tempo changes…. I don’t know. Great bass. John Paul Jones was so underrated.
lol…I walked down the aisle to Foxy Lady and we danced to “Would you go with me” by Josh Turner….such a fun whimsy song!
That was actually my first choice, was the Josh Turner song, but it was “too country” for my hubby….he picked out “1234″ by the Plain White T’s and so that’s what we used!
So in other words, you are not badass at all.
My husband and I are big music geeks. Initially, we were going to use Stevie Wonder’s “I Believe When I fall in love (it will be forever)”. The closer we got to the wedding, we realized that while it is a beautiful song, it wasn’t us, and we went with the single edit of David Bowie’s “Heroes.” The single edit does not have the “nothing will keep us together line” and some other less wedding friendly parts. It’s doubly great for us, as we are spending part of our honeymoon in Berlin.
We also did an itunes DJ, and we got lots of compliments on our music selection. And we loved every song we played.
Wow, you guys are just too frigging cool; I’m soooooo impressed.
Crazy Love, Van Morrison
Yay for Van Morrison! Our first dance was to, “Someone Like You.”
Mine and my husbands first dance was to Someone Like You by Van Morrison as well! Beautiful song!
My dad and I danced to “Tupelo Honey”…
Yay for Van! We used “Moondance” for our October wedding.
My husband and I almost danced to “Someone Like You,” but went with “Warm Love” instead, always been a huge Van Morrison fan!
Moondance . . . Perfect!
Yes Van Morrison – but Into the Mystic. Or Have I Told You Lately That I Love You – Van Morrison and The Chieftains.
What a fab song – would be one of my possibilities, along with Let’s Stay Together by Al Green and Some Kind of Wonderful by Grand Funk Railroad.
Let’s stay together loving you whether times are good ro bad happy or sad was the closing theme and it was pretty prophetic
Let’s Stay Together was our wedding song! Not a typical choice but the lyrics are perfect. We were very happy with our choice even if some people thought it was weird
We danced to “Love and Happiness” by Al Green- perfect for us. The man knows love.
Same here! “Crazy Love” was our first dance song, only we used the Aaron Neville version from the movie “Phenomenon”. While I normally can’t stand Neville, when I heard that song during such a poignant part of the movie, I bawled like a baby into my popcorn. Brian McKnight also did a cover a few years back and it’s pretty good, too.
Our first song was “All I ever needed” by Bret Michaels
Say what you want about him, but he writes a great ballad!
We danced to Better Together by Jack Johnson – it was perfect.
I love Better Together! Great song. For our wedding we didn’t have an official first dance, but our song is Three Little Birds by Bob Marley. We’ll start singing that song to each other any time one of us is feeling down or stressed out and it always cheers us up.
That was our front runner for a while. Love JJ. We finally settled on I Want You by Tom Waits follwed up with the song from The Wedding Singer. Romantic into cheese to get everyone to lighten up.
the last song played at the reception as we ran out to the get away car was ALO’s girl i wanna lay you down. my husband joked that he was going to play it but i didn’t think he was serious!
Ugh–your husband sounds like a tool.
My husband and I were married last Friday night (ahhh still feels weird to call him my husband). Our first dance was “To Make You Feel My Love” and it was the Kris Allen version he sang on Idol.
If I ever get married, that is the song I’ve chosen – the Bob Dylan or Adele version. I can not decide between the two.
I also really like Bon Jovi’s Want To Make A Memory – but I’ve been told that is beyond depressing.
I love ” Want To Make A Memory” too! But yes. it’s a downer. I love gospel singer Damita Haddon’s “The Wedding Song”. It’s a duet with her husband Deitrick Haddon, who is the more well known gospel singer of the two, but it’s absolutely the theme of my relationship with my boyfriend. And plus it has that cool ’90s R&B ballad sound to it – which is nostalgic in and of itself.
We just got married 3 weeks ago and we used “Forever” by the Beach Boys! And calling him my “husband” still feels strange to me too! I guess it takes a while : )
Oh, we danced to Lifehouse-You and Me. It was simple, beautiful, and it said something elegantly. So magical. However, he wanted Finger 11′s Amber. But we did go with the Lifehouse.
Oops, hah, didn’t realize I put something down by finger eleven, I was just listening to them. No, I actually meant to write that he wanted Rogue Waves, In Your Eyes. Which is also beautiful, and was in our wedding mix.
We also did You and Me by Lifehouse, more a beautiful song than an original choice, but we loved it. We just saw them live for the first time a couple of weeks ago and they are amazing! Made me even happier with my choice.